Jk makes the following vapid, baseless and libelous accusations on last.fm in response to "How do the charts work?":

So, the charts work like this:

faxed, our fearless last.fm Canberra group leader, goes to the CD store and asks for the 15 CDs that have been on the shelves for the longest. You know, the type that are in prominent display next to the “20 polka hits of 1984” and “elevator classics” albums, below the poster of the latest Home and Away tie-in CD.

Then, because his job at the corn factory doesn’t pay him much, he has to run out of the store without paying for the CDs. This is usually followed by a 5-minute faxed-gets-chased-by-security-guards event, but he almost always makes it out safely. We’re all trying to forget about that time that he didn’t.

He then takes the CDs to his loungeroom, and lays them out in a 5-by-3 grid. Standing to one side, he’ll fill his mouth with as many potato crisps as is possible. One of his flatmates is charged with the task of punching him squarely in the abdomen, causing the chips to burst out and scatter all over the CDs. The album with the most chips on it goes at number one on the charts, the CD with the next-highest chip density will go at second, and so forth. He’ll then patiently clean up the mess of CDs and potato crisps, in order to do the same task next week.

So there you go.

I would never stand near a Home and Away poster! Not to mention that I have abs of steal!